Thursday, June 14, 2012

Sunshine and Rainbows

Lately I feel like I have been walking around in a near constant state of bliss. I have always leaned towards being a glass half full kind of gal, and Boss sometimes gets annoyed that I tend to live in the land of sunshine and rainbows while he has taken up residence in the land of maturity and practicality (hey, every marriage needs at least one responsible party and I, for one, am glad he is willing to take one for the team!), but lately life just seems extra sweet. The sunshine seems brighter and the rainbows more colorful.

Boss is home for summer vacation and we are soaking up all of the family togetherness that we can. Our days start early (earlier for some than others, though I will not mention any names), and they usually end in the back yard with firefly's lighting up the slowly fading sky and deer munching on our apple trees nearby. And we have spent the hours in between going on family adventures. Sometimes our adventures take us to fun places like the amusement park or downtown to the big city to walk along the river and stop for ice cream. Other times our adventures have taken us only as far as our backyard, but a ride around the property on daddy's tractor sure seems pretty magical if you are a two year old little boy. Really, adventures are simply about enjoying and experiencing life together, and we have been doing a lot of that. It is as near perfect as perfect can be in this life, and I don't want to take a single moment of it for granted.

I think the reason that I am enjoying this season, these days so very much, is because all of our seasons together have not been like this. Last month, Boss and I celebrated nine years of marriage. Nine years and three beautiful children later, and sometimes I still feel like we are really just beginning. But one thing I know for sure is that it just keeps getting better. That first year of marriage? It was hard. Really hard. And some seasons after that were even harder. Two people prone to sin, blending two personalities, ideas, dreams into one life can get messy. It can be easy to want to give up. But I never once thought that we wouldn't make. And here we are. We have made it. And we will continue to make it. Because after every storm always comes the rainbow. The days where the sun shines just a little bit brighter. And those are the days we are living right now. And so I want to remember.

I want to remember how handsome Boss looks as he prunes trees, pushes little girls on swings, and chases Jack through the yard. I want to remember how Emma looks at almost eight years old, her hair growing longer, her body subtly beginning to change. Still very much little girl, but hints of maturity beginning to show from time to time. I want to remember Kate's laughter as she flys through the air on the wooden swing that hangs from our tree, and the way that she is still the first to fall asleep each night, her strawberry smelling hair on my pillow. And I want to remember my Jack boy, how funny he is, always making us laugh, but how he is still always the first to cover Mama in kisses. And toddler kisses are THE BEST. These are good, happy days and I want to savor them.

I know I said life was as close to perfect as perfect can be, but the reality is that it is still life. I have already gone over budget, and there are still two weeks left in this month before our next paycheck. Our bathroom sink leaks, and we found some rotting wood that needs replaced on the back of the house. No one wants to buy our 12 passenger van that we really want/need to sell. And just last week Boss and I had a disagreement over what our date night was going to look like. I was thinking dressing up and going out, he was thinking grabbing something from the cubbard and staying at home. No life threatening tragedies for sure, but daily things that can drain life in no time at all if you will let them. So I suppose no, it's not perfect. It's just life. But it's our life. It's our story. And most importantly, it's what we have. These days, this life, it is what our family has been given. And tonight? Tonight that is enough for me.