Thursday, February 7, 2013

My Castle in the Air

(Two of My Children, for Whom the Castle is Being Built)

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them. - Henry David Thoreau

When you choose to live life a bit differently than the rest of the world, sometimes that life can be lonely. Some days it feels as though it would just be easier to choose the broad road, to walk along with the rest of the world, to blend in a bit more.

We began homeschooling our children four years ago.

Homeschooling wasn't something that we set out to do. In fact, it sort of found us when we weren't even looking for it. At the time our oldest child was to begin Kindergarten, I was working a 'job' that required most of the afternoon and evening hours of my day. I knew that if I put my tiny one on the bus, she would arrive home each afternoon right when my 'job' was to begin. When would I help her with homework? When would we snuggle? When would she have my undivided attention? So our homeschooling journey began.

And somewhere along the way, our family fell in LOVE with it.

I LOVE that I am the main influence in my children's lives.
I LOVE that my children are each other's greatest friends.
I LOVE that I am in charge of what goes into my children's heads and hearts.
I LOVE that my children are relaxed, without the weight of the world pulling at them.
I LOVE that my children are free to be children.
I LOVE that I can teach my children about God, just as I can teach them how to read.
I LOVE that for my children, family comes first and friendships are second.
I LOVE that my children can learn real life skills, just as they can learn academics.

So many things to LOVE. And now I can't imagine schooling my children any other way.

Until I lose focus, and my eyes start drifting towards another's path. I see women dropping their children off at a school building before heading to the gym and think that would be nice (except for the gym part). I see women heading to jobs where sometimes they simply earn 'fun' money for themselves and think fun money would be nice. I see women sitting quietly at Panera Bread, sipping a latte, while reading their Bible (all while I am cleaning up spilled milk, spooning soup into little mouths, and trying to train three children how to be quiet and appropriately behaved in a restaurant) and think ahhh, quiet sounds nice. I see women who have time to devote themselves to their passions or hobbies and think what's a hobby? I think no differently of these women who have chosen to do life differently than I have, as we each have the right to choose our own path, but sometimes looking at another's path begins to make me doubt my own.

But then I remember. I began building a castle in the air a long time ago. Long before Boss was by my side. And in my castle there were many children, family unity, a strong faith, a full table. A bond so strong that nothing could break through the castle walls. And I know full well that I am right where I should be. And these years of constant training, and children all at home, and the teaching and the learning are all part of the foundation of my castle in the air.

We are on the right path. Even on the lonely days, the days where being different feels too heavy, we are still building. Working towards something greater. Building, together, the very castle that I have always dreamed of.

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